Altar Call – Opelika-Auburn News
Walter Albritton
What fun it is to ride a floating hotel all the way to
When I retired from pastoral ministry a year ago, my wife
made me promise her that we would “go somewhere.” We kicked around the idea of
going to several places before we finally agreed on one.
My first suggestion was to go back to Loachapoka. We had
been there once for the Syrup Sopping event, and we did not have to catch a
plane in
“No way,” she said. “We stood in the hot sun for an hour and
the biscuits were cold.”
Then I proposed going to
“Our sons have been several times, and they say those
NASCAR races are fun,” I told her. As I gazed into her steely green eyes, I
knew we were not going to
Remembering that she enjoyed visiting the Galleria in
“Yeah, I know you won’t spend the money to stay in a nice
motel,” she replied, “but you seem to have forgotten that I don’t like to shop
anywhere but the Dollar Store.” That killed that idea.
We had already ruled out several other places. Dean has
always wanted to see the
Another trip we both wanted to take was a train ride. We
wanted to ride in style, on board the American Orient Express from
Guess what? I could add a room on the house for what that
trip would cost! I want to spend our children’s inheritance, but not on one
train ride.
My next proposal was a gamble but I thought she might go
for it. Dean loves Mexican food. “Honey,” I said, “instead of wasting money on
a trip somewhere, how about this – let me take you out to eat at a nice Mexican
restaurant once a week for the rest of our lives?”
Tears welled up in her eyes as she reached slowly for a
hammer. I knew my goose was cooked. In my sweetest, most gentle voice, I
acquiesced and said, “Alright, dear, what do you say we go on a cruise?” She
put the hammer back down, and sweetly said, “That will work; make the
reservations!”
So, on Saturday, May 24, we drove to
It was like a floating hotel, with 14 decks, or floors. One
deck featured a promenade, with many shops where you could buy diamonds,
drinks, T-shirts, and souvenirs. No
country boy was ever more surprised than I was to discover what facilities were
on that ship.
My first shock was the skating rink. Daily ice shows,
featuring as many as 20 skaters, were available. Moreover, the skaters were
quite professional. They were not amateurs.
Each evening we enjoyed a major production by singers,
dancers, comedians, and magicians – in a theater that must have seated 1500
people. There were 3200 passengers and about 1200 crewmembers.
The excursions to the islands were fun. We had never been
to
My wife and I enjoyed sitting on the top deck near the
swimming pool. The breeze, especially at night, was heavenly. In addition, it
was fun watching people of all sizes going swimming. One dear woman moved a lot
of water when she jumped in; she was as big as I am.
There were several first class restaurants. We were
assigned a table in the Nutcracker Dining Room, where a woman played a grand
piano during the dinner hours.
Cruise ships are famous for the food, and this one was
surely one of the finest. We ate too much, too many times a day, but enjoyed
every bite. Everyone had the same idea: go on a diet as soon as we return home!
Some of the folks on board seemed happier than others. I attributed that to the alcohol, but perhaps
it was the chocolate. There was plenty of wine and chocolate available.
As a teetotaler for 71 years, I remain convinced that I
have not missed anything by choosing an alcohol-free lifestyle. After all, as
the beer commercials remind us, somebody has to stay sober to drive the drunks
home.
The casino stayed busy night and day for the gamblers.
That may be fun for some, but it has never seemed smart to me to give my money
to a slot machine. As for playing cards, I much prefer Rook to Poker.
There was an earlier time in my life when I might have
been tempted to play strip poker, but not anymore. I don’t want anybody but my
wife to have the honor of viewing my aging body in my birthday suit; the
excitement might cause a heart attack.
My wife and I enjoyed listening to a group from the
The trip was made more enjoyable by the presence of our
son Matt and his wife Tammy. The four of us had a ball, and we grew closer.
By the time we arrived back in
My wife was pleased at last. We finally went “some place”
on a trip. We enjoyed it immensely. We may go on another cruise some day.
Still, I must confess, I long to go back to Loachapoka
and sop a biscuit, a hot one, in some of that finger-licking syrup. Simple
pleasures may be the best, after all. + + + +